Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Bikang CUPtrophy - the More-or-less Halfway Point

As we arrive at the end of the second day of play in Bikang CUPtrophy 2004, we have seen the emergence of some key and some not-so-key idiosyncracies in the teams and the players involved. We have also encountered issues with rules, interpretation, implementation and overall enthufunjoyaggropassion. Of course, as is the norm with all things Bikang, the CUPtrophy event has fallen victim to several instances of craziness brought crashing down by laziness. I must pause at this point to credit that last statement to our own Zeb. Continuing, here are the top 5 lists of key and not-key things from the first two days of Bikang CUPtrophy 2004, both in no particular order.

Top 5 Key Things
  1. Stellar Newcomers - Special mention must be made of the newcomers to Top-T cricket who have distinguished themselves with bat and ball over the first two days, proving that it is not as difficult to play here as the veterans pretend it is. All it takes is to be mother-key players. Sriram (Silphosia RUM), taking over for VicP, has established himself as the hardest out in this tournament so far. Narendra and Bonnie (SOSalamia) have literally turned in great shows with the ball.
  2. Spirit of Competition - Overall standard of competition has been high, and teams have shown excellent sportsmanship in their conduct during the opening stages of the tournament. One hopes that this will continue through the rest of the tourney, when the stakes are raised much higher. A round of applause for the umpires for maintaining firm control over the proceedings.
  3. Ling - While we were playing cricket, he was out at Marina helping with relief efforts for folks affected by the tsunami.
  4. Wretch - Besides being the only woman in Bikang CUPtrophy 2004, she also organised all trophies and Om-rolling activities. One understands that her intoxication limits are under strict supervision during the tournament, but let's all have a drink in her name.
  5. Groundskeeper Willie - Also known as Shengu from The Place Above, for organizing cleaning of TopT in time for and during Bikang CUPtrophy 2004, with able assistance from whoever it was that assisted him (write a comment with those names).

Top 5 Not-key Things
  1. Tsunami - While we can't argue with a tidal wave the size of the Indian Ocean, we can most definitely curse it for all we're worth. So this bitch comes in and takes out the Eastern shoreline of South India, and kills or ruins a few thousand people, and then comes back the next day for more. Not key at all.
  2. Computer Manoj - Not to blame proprietor of The Place Above, the aforementioned key Shengu, but lack of crowd noise, music and other such distractions are a blatant disregard for playing conditions, and I recommend a severe reprimand for the computer by BCCB.
  3. Bikang Manojes the National Antheths - Laziness defeats the craziness, as Zeb said, by most teams ignoring this rather important idea of being a nation. But what is there, let's play some tough and drink off, raa. But what is an oath without an O-th?
  4. Blog Inactivity - First captains chilled off like goats on the request to nominate a blogger, and then blog volunteers manojed twice by leaving scoresheets at the venue, thereby no longer having a reference for match reports. Maybe we'll pick it up as the tourney continues.
  5. Rule Interpretation - While most rules were drafted very carefully, interpretation of these rules seem to be an issue. It has been a source of delay/interruption a couple of times already, but hopefully all problems have been sorted out and fixed in time for the home stretch of Bikang CUPtrophy 2004.
Completely Unofficial Halfway Awards

Best Fielding Team - MMJOSHI
Best Batting Team - Silphosia RUM
Best Bowling Team - SOS
Best Newcomer - Sriram
Best Batsman
- Sriram
Best Bowler - Shengu
Overall Dude - Ling, for recognizing that it's just a game.

Flash News - Karunanidhi is apparently not dead, but is threatening to die off and unleash his minions on a violent glass-smashing spree in a desperate venture to resurrect his not-dead spirit from its deep-resting place in an IV drip bottle somewhere in the ICU at Apollo Hospital. I think it's because the minions don't know which glass container to smash.

Other News - Labdee, one half of the D's, has decided to attend all games and participate as one of two scorers. The question is, will her evil employers, OT (OverTime), share her enthusiasm for Bikang CUPtrophy 2004? Stay tuned, folks, the battle has begun.

Friday, December 24, 2004

christmas party @ house of hiran

contact bikang for further information



Namaste..Salam Male Ghum

Team B comprising of Inisullah bin Srinivasan, Sumanthullah bin Kalidas, Sainathurinisa, Bonnie Bakshwain, Al Narendra Subaie will be called....

Sultanate Of Salamia - SOS

All Habibis lets play the tournament in fair spirit.....Insha Allah may the best team win....


Thursday, December 23, 2004

Who is this team A?

Announcing the official name of team comprising Koid, Caddy, Shengar, PS Jain and Self as.....

Majestic Mohammedan Jihad Of Severely Holy Islamics ...

abbreviated to MM Joshi , so the fanaticism continues.

Enemies of the Jihad, beware.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

bikangCUPtrophy | official logo

official logo

Bikgang CUPtrophy

hear ye ....hear all.....
The Grand Bikgang CUPtrophy gets underway at 7 PM , 26th of December 2004.Here is the schedule:

Dec. 26th:

7:00 PM opening ceremony
8:00 PM A v C
9:30 PM B v D

Dec. 27th

8:00 PM A v B
9:30 PM C v D

Dec. 28th

8:00 PM A v D
9: 30 PM B v C

The points system is as follows:

win 4 pts
draw 1 pt
tie 2 pts
loss 0 pts

The two teams with the maximum no of points will go into the finals.
In case of tie in points head to head between the concerned teams will be taken into account
In the case of a tie still the team with the more number of first innings leads throughout the tournament will go through
In case of it being tied still the issue will be decided over the toss of a coin.

The teams have been announced this evening.
The teams are as follows:

Team A


Team B


Team C

Balajing Satish Kumar
Vic P

Team D

The wretch
Vijay(uncle of nondetail)

It has been decided that the teams will give themselves imaginary country names and thereby national anthems which shall be composed by each team. Jubbs, self or shengu can be contacted for appropriate recording slots so that these can be ready in time for the opening ceremony at 7 PM , on the 26th. These submissions can be handed over to the director of the opening ceremony, Shengu.

Almost all of the rules of regular 30 over cricket on the terrace will be followed with a few notable exceptions resulting from the availability of umpires.

1. Bowlers can be no balled for overstepping the cease resulting in the loss of a run and an extra ball.

2. Batsmen can appeal for fast but the umpire will hold the final say in upholding the appeal.

3. Dissent of all kinds will be severely clamped down upon. (Chucking of bats, abusive language towards opponents and umpire, continuous padhuthufying of umpire, any question asked to umpire by players who are playing the current match but are not currently in action(eg. BSFs) and anything else the umpire feels is dissent in accordance with the overall spirit of the game)
The captains of respective teams will be responsible for these acts and will face a first warning and a subsequent innings suspension in case of any such event.

4. The umpires decision will be final.

5. It will be the captains responsiblity to get his team together in time for his scheduled match. Any request for changes in schedules have to be placed before the BCCB captains council at least 24 hours in advance.
In case of non availability of a player for unavoidable reasons, the captain can recruit a player not in any of the four teams currently playing.

6. In case of a suspension, the team will continue to play with the suspended player only being able to field,

For further info. team members are requested to contact their respective captains.

Watch this space for more updates. amendments to rules and playing conditions and general overall behavior.
Win or lose We will booze.
Of course, we could do with dazzling comets!


Monday, December 20, 2004

Tough match tough responsibilities

Heres whats expected form each one of u guys for the bikgang cricket tournament starting 26th December 2004

iiii and inis - Organising Committee

P Sagarmal Jain - Logo and T shirt design

Zeb - T shirt procurement and printing

Shengur - Groundsmen

Diraj - Trophy selection and procurement

Hisown - Mosquito net for the terrace

come on bikgangers gear up for the tournament...More suggestions are welcome and anyone taking initiative will be rewarded..Teams and schedule will be announced soon..


Saturday, December 18, 2004

My first movie review!

A follow up to such a path breaking and impact creating movie as Lagaan comes with all the associated hype and baggage making it almost impossible not to disappoint. Swades does not surprise in this regard.

Swades is the story of Mohan Bhargava (Shah Rukh Khan), a successful young NRI working at NASA. Amidst the trappings of success he yearns for the mother figure in his life, his nanny Kaveriamma (Kishori Ballal). He also has feelings of guilt for having kept her at an old age home. Overwhelmed by all of this he decided to go to India and bring her back, thereby completing his life.

His journey takes him to a little village in Uttar Pradesh, where he meets her and his childhood friend Gita (Gayatri Joshi). Gita lives with Kaveriamma and runs the local school in this village beset with poverty, infrastructure problems, child labour and the like. What begins as a couple of harmless quests in order to convince Kaveriamma to go back with him slowly turns into a mission of making the village (and in the process,India) a better place. Inspiration for him is never at a shortage in the form of the beautiful, strong willed and independent Gita who has no plans but to stay there and make it a better place anyway. Needless to say the two of them are inevitably drawn towards each other. Mohan is soon torn between his life back in the USA and his new found “make India a better place” purpose in life ,of which Gita is an integral part of. How he handles this conflict forms the rest of the film.

What could have been told in two hours is dragged on to three hours plus and this to me is the single biggest drawback in the film. Large dollops of moral instruction and preachiness are generously dished out to the unsuspecting public. Sure, with a theme like this some amount of the above is to be expected but then it goes way overboard here. Subtlety in driving home the point is definitely not one of the things Swades has going for it. Some of the song sequences seem to pop in from nowhere and none of them ever seem to end. The characters in the film are all good. There are no shades of black or even grey, which takes away from the realism. I would think that a young tyke trying to bring about change and upheaval in a traditionalist and rigid surrounding would meet with a great deal of resistance and difficulty while trying to feed the people his ideas. For Mohan it all seems to come too easily. The people seem to be most happy to listen to whatever he says and resistance if any is minimal.

Now for the good points. The performances are very good across the board ( except for the American actors, who all seem wooden in appearance and manner). Shah Rukh Khan and Gayathri Joshi look great together and carry out their roles with élan. The romance between the two is handled very well and this makes for a lot of very enjoyable sequences. This can also be said of some of the other sequences involving the village folk. ARRahmans music is good without being spectacular. The songs seem a trifle too long though. Needless to say, the movie comes with an important message and it is for this single reason that Ashuthosh Govarikar needs to be complemented and admired. To cut a long story short, I would give Swades three stars out of five. Definitely not a must-watch but then not a total washout either.

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Andhe Scrotuth-yae Fry Pannitaange Saar!


"Frequent use of laptop computers in a laptop position directly exposes the scrotum to the dissipated high internal operating temperature of the machine," the authors said.
"In addition, the use of a laptop requires a special body position ... when the scrotum is trapped between closely approximated thighs."
A case of a man who burnt his penis and scrotum after using a laptop was reported in the Lancet journal in 2002.
The researchers said after one hour the average increase in temperature in the left and right side of the scrotum in men working with laptops was 2.6°C and 2.8°C respectively.

wotisthisisay: "http://www.abc.net.au/science/news/stories/s222944.htm"

Monday, December 06, 2004

a new place | the place above

Shankar Sundaram a former employee of IByeth has is now the proud tenant of the place formerly known as up of india and topT and now known as the place above.

This only means one thing for the rest of us, we all now have one more place in the same place to take a comfortable death upon pulasthicating ourselves this december.

so all ye bikgangers come off raaaaa and come off to chennaimadras.

its a fear being here anyhow | jude 3:16




Trust iii to get lazy bikangs (read self... er that's me not Self) going...

Anyhoo... tank up and speak out... top 5 movies of all time?


Saturday, December 04, 2004

Its december | lets party

its here goats, the dreaded december, the chennai chapter welcomed it with a severe bar-be-que on top-T, which was also arti raos farewell party, it was a glorious meat based party, sam provided us with copious quantities of meat which fed us through the night, valli on the next day and toto till date eats scraps from that day.

whatte loulie death it was, so come off raaaaaaaaaa, its december lets party.

Thursday, November 25, 2004

December | 02 days to go

calling all bikgangers its a december, international congregation of many chapters of bikgang happens usually in chennai every december, so hear ye hear all come off raaaaaa to chennaimadras for we will pulasthicate ourselves and take out glorious december weather.

its a fear being here anyhow

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Naku Penda Piya-Pelita Nasi Kandar.....Liberian Girl

P.Sagarmal Jain next time at pelita you must try one of these dishes before Ais Kachang....An incomplete list of impolite dishes...

1. Sambal Udang
2. Daging Kicap
3. Burung Puyuh
4. Ayam Kampung Goreng
5. Ayam Piru
6. Kari Ikan
7. Ketam Masala
8. Kambing Ros
9. Ayam Kurma
10. Ayam Madu
11.Kari Ayam
12. Nasi Biriyani Ayam
13. Sotong
14. Kari Kepala Ikan

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Bike gang Calendar

Calendars are normally based on astronomical events, and the two most important astronomical objects are the sun and the moon. Our concept of a year is based on the earth's motion around the sun. The time from one fixed point, such as a solstice or equinox, to the next is called a tropical year. Its length is currently 365.242190 days, but it varies. Around 1900 its length was 365.242196 days, and around 2100 it will be 365.242184 days
Our concept of a month is based on the moon's motion around the earth, although this connection has been broken in the calendar commonly used now. The time from one new moon to the next is called a synodic month, and its length is currently 29.5305889 days, but it varies. Around 1900 its length was 29.5305886 days, and around 2100 it will be 29.5305891 days.
Note that these numbers are averages.
The actual length of a particular year may vary by several minutes due to the influence of the gravitational force from other planets. Similarly, the time between two new moons may vary by several hours due to a number of factors, including changes in the gravitational force from the sun, and the moon's orbital inclination.
It is unfortunate that the length of the tropical year is not a multiple of the length of the synodic month. This means that with 12 months per year, the relationship between our month and the moon cannot be maintained
Way back in 1994 four young research scientist working at "Ramchandrans" spaced out research lab on south boag road came up with a theory to solve this problem. The unique calendar they had developed had 10 days in a week and 30 days in a month. There would be 3 weeks in a month and 360 days in a year. The remaining 5 days during which the moon will still be making its transition will be used to play a test match between India and Australia with clear instructions to the curator that the game has to go on till the 450th over is bowled.
Having come up with their suggestion to solve the problem the young scientists went on to name all 10 days of the week and heres what they came up with. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Today, Yesterday and Holiday. So this way we have a designated holiday and sunday is no more a holiday. This will not only solve the issue of divisibility but also will be lots of fun till people get a hang of this. Every now and then someone will say Today is a Holiday completely forgetting that they are 2 different days of the week. Also with this new calendar we get to use words like monday, tuesday, Etc more often than just calling them today, yesterday. Their research had to be abandoned half way due to high cost of intoxicating substances and overall lack of interest. If you find this concept interesting we have lots more. Write into us at researchtigers@yahoo.com. Indicate how much cash you are willing to spare for this groundbreaking research in the subject of your mail.

This is what i have to say about saturday night

Hangover Rating

One Star Hangover (*)
No pain. No real feeling of illness. You're able to function relatively well. However, you are still parched. You can drink 5 sodas and still feel this way. For some reason, you are craving a steak & fries.

Two Star Hangover (**)
No pain, but something is definitely amiss. You may look okay, but you have the mental capacity of a staple gun. The coffee you are chugging is only increasing your rumbling gut, which is still tossing around the bird from the 3:00 AM revive the barbaque trip. There is some definite havoc being wreaked upon your bowels.

Three Star Hangover (***)
Slight headache. Stomach feels crappy. You are definitely not
productive. Anytime a girl walks by you gag because her perfume reminds you of the "Ais kacang" your alcoholic friends dared you to eat / drink whatever. Life would be better right now if you were home in your bed watching your ceiling turn in to a flashback sequence. You've had 4 cups of coffee, a gallon of water, 3 iced teas and a Coke --- yet you haven't peed once.

Four Star Hangover (****)
Life sucks. Your head is throbbing. Theres an Iron Maiden concert in my head.....would you like some free tickets. You can't speak too quickly or else you might puke. You wore nice clothes, but that can't hide the fact that you only shaved one side of your face. (For the ladies, it looks like you put your make-up on while riding the bumper cars.) Your eyes look like one big red vein, and even your hair hurts. Your sphincter is in perpetual spasm, and the first of about five shits you take during the day brings water to the eyes of everyone who enters the bathroom.

Five Star Hangover, (*****)
You have a second heartbeat in your head, which is actually annoying
the employee who sits in the next cube. Rum breath is seeping out of
every pore and making you dizzy. You still have toothpaste crust in the corners of your mouth from brushing your teeth in an attempt to get the remnants of the poop fairy out. Your body has lost the ability to generate saliva so your tongue is suffocating you. You don't have the foggiest idea who the hell the stranger was passed out in your bed this morning. Any attempt to defecate results in a fire hose like discharge of alcohol-scented fluid with a rare 'floater' thrown in. The sole purpose of this 'floater' seems to be to splash the toilet water all over your ass. Death sounds pretty good about right now....

so there it is my friends, twas a loulie death by all and repeated deaths by yours truly that summed up the barbaque based saturday.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

"Bar-be-que" by the beach house

bikgang chennai chapter invites other bikgangers to

This saturday the chennai chapter is celebrating the return of inis to his homeland by throwing a "bar-be-que" by the beach house party, more details will follow shortly.

Friday, November 19, 2004

Conference Bike

http://www.conferencebike.com/ - this website offers this item called the "conference bike", its pretty cool check this out guys, for parties on the move this is an ideal solution, if the bangalore and chennai chapters invest in one such item then we can have picnic wherever, all travel problems sorted.



Just look at it.........whatteloulie

Thursday, November 18, 2004

The dreaded "Ais Kacang"

heres the dreaded "Ais Kacang"




Ais Kacang Redux

To be precise, Ais Kacang has reduxed...er, reduced P. S. Jain to just P. ain, while veteran return engagements such as yours truly were able to negotiate said obstacle with alacrity and minimal discomfort. Shengar, while partaking wisely of red-based bird preparations chose to investigate the nature of a certain slimy ingredient in the Kacang creature, and postulated the possibility of it being litchis. Why, for the sake of everything healthy, would one put rajma, corn and litchis in ice covered with nasty rooh-afza?

B'lore Picnic - Turtles or Bikang?

A turtle family decided to go on a picnic. Turtles, being naturally slow about things, took seven years to prepare for their outing. Finally the turtle family left home looking for a suitable place for their outing.

During the second year of their journey they found a place ideal for them at last! For about six months they cleaned up the area, unpacked the picnic basket, and completed the arrangements. Then they discovered they had forgotten the salt. A picnic without salt would be a disaster, they all agreed.

After a lengthy discussion, the youngest turtle was chosen to retrieve the salt from home. Although he was the fastest of the slow moving turtles, the little turtle whined, cried, and wobbled in his shell.

He agreed to go on one condition: that no one would eat until he returned.

The family consented and the little turtle left. Three years passed and the little turtle had not returned. Five years... six years... then on the seventh year of his absence, the oldest turtle could no longer contain his hunger. He announced that he was going to eat and begun to unwrap a sandwich.

At that point the little turtle suddenly popped out from behind a tree shouting,
"SEE! I knew you wouldn't wait. Now I am not going to go get the salt."

Back to the future

just discovered a quirk with the time settings. if u didn't choose the right timezone, the order of the postings goes haywire. my blog created after the famous 'Ais Kachang' post appeared before it.
i realized that my setting was wrong - Indian/Mahe which is UTC+4:30

can everyone set the same timezone? and let it be UTC+5:30Asia/Calcutta .


"Mona darling, the password is legs...spread it"


in the true egalitarian spirit of the internet, i thought all confirmed members will be made administrators but there are weird issues like everyone can edit everyone's post. so reverting back to single admin mode.

please pull in more bikangers to increase the blog traffic. if u want to get emails of the blogs, go to settings-email and enter your email id there.


Extreme Kachang

Hear ye! Hear One and all!,

Mr.P.Sagarmal Jain, resident of Beasant Nagar today first hand experienced the rare but rather curious phenomenon "mortifis ais kachhis" commonly known as "Death by Kachang". Having been in jolly good spirits all evening he decided to up the stakes by taking up "Finish your Kachang and its free challenge", a custom in these parts. So the psychedelic taste bud tester, Ais Kacang it was.
Ten minutes passed and then arrived the Ais kacang, resplendent in its syrupy pink glory, like a recently erupted volcano, complete with little suprises invisible to the naked eye.
Mr. Jain went about his business, after an acknowledgement of the visual impact that the aforementioned "delicacy in certain parts" had. Slowly the cracks began to show on the until now cheerful challenger. Soon he was done with the icecream and started to penetrate the ice, a little grimace here, an expression of surprise at the appearance of a bit of rajma and corn. When the slimy material showed up was about the time he was starting to lose it. Soon the consumption of kachang was puncuated by little spoonfuls of red gravy, which he probably was hoping, would act as some kind of tastebud preserver. Needless to say, at the end of the day the kachang was the winner. P.Sagarmal Jain was a broken man and this he demonstrated by undertaking several acts of mass destruction and violence. He was truly kachanged!!
Meanwhile in another part of the same table, Mr. Sumanth srivatsan of lite Nandanam side, cheerfully asked for and took out his second kachang! Overall an extreme kachang experience

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

come off raas!

hey trprs,

wanted to check out whether this group blog thingy will work out for bikang.
so, everyone's invited. (i.e. every bikanger).

if u r new to blogging check out: http://help.blogger.com/

if u r using mozilla/firefox: http://blog.warmbrain.com/justblogit/

go on, blog urself!